Colour Me Confused: Inexplicable Subjects on which to base a Colouring Book

As many of you know, I’m a great fan of the BookDepository.  Apart from their fantabulous range of books, low, low prices, and free international shipping (!), I find great enjoyment in their search mechanism. I get unfathomable delight from typing in a random word and casting my eyes over the numerous and unexpected titles that pop up.  It’s like fishing in Lake Oddball.  In fact, even an innocent word like “colouring” will turn up the most bizarre range of tomes.  Books that make you think, “now what publisher in their right mind thought THAT would be a big hit amongst the community of colouring-in enthusiasts?”

So today I will share with you some of the more exciting titles that have turned up in the fishing net of the Good Ship Catalogue Trawler.  These are but a small sample, mind, of the hilariously weird titles that lurk in the search engine, just waiting for their chance to be spotted by that niche-market colouring fan…please, enjoy:

  • Stewing over a birthday present for the Li’l Dawg or Li’l Shawty in your life? The Gangsta Rap Coloring Book may be just what the gang leader ordered!   In fact, why not follow the gift to its logical (and inevitable) conclusion, and give it in conjunction with the Police Station Coloring Book, which helpfully features “thirty full-page drawings introduce youngsters to a host of law enforcement professionals on the job”.  It’s never too early for youngsters to appreciate art imitating life.

gangsta rappolice station

  • If appreciating art’s contemporary forms is more your show, why not test your pastels on Body Art: the Tattoo Design Coloring Book?  This little gem features “men and women showing off tattoos on their arms, legs, and backs”.  That’s right!   For all you aspiring tattoo artists, this book will provide essential practice at colouring inside the lines – before you try it with indelible ink on your unsuspecting and probably drunk best friend.

body art

  • For those of a more sedate, and dare I say, modest disposition, here are two offerings to satisfy your bland and uncomplicated desires. If An Amish Farm Coloring Book doesn’t quite scratch that itch, I guarantee you will be transported to your happy place by the Historic Southern Lighthouses Coloring Book.  Thankfully, both of these books are part of a series, so you need not fear running out of Amish or Lighthouse related imagery to render in living colour.

amish farm  lighthouse

  • Finally, after constant hectoring from the Slightly Creepy Equine Enthusiasts Lobby, Dover Publications has thoughtfully made available the Horse Anatomy Coloring Book.  If you’ve ever thought that colouring in the outside of the horse was simply not enough, Dover has thoughtfully rectified this thorny issue by providing pages depicting the horse’s “skeleton, muscles, nervous system, and major organs” for your colouring pleasure.  Red and white crayons at the ready, kiddies!

horse anatomy

In case you thought these were the most bizarre, I have actually excluded the most inexplicable colouring book that I’ve come across.  That one is dedicated entirely to the reproductive hardware of female fleshlings. I would have included it here, but the title contains a word that is considered particularly rude and unsavoury amongst more civilised fleshlings.

I’ll let you all go now so you can make sure your colouring pencils are sharp enough to tackle the challenges contained in these tomes….Incidentally, if anyone owns one of these books, I’d love to see some finished examples.

Until next time,

Bruce

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19 thoughts on “Colour Me Confused: Inexplicable Subjects on which to base a Colouring Book

  1. This is hilarious. I love seeing what comes up in searches too, but I’ve never stopped to look at the more peculiar titles. I especially love the idea of a lighthouse colouring book – because white is the most exciting colour in the palette, obviously. 😉

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  2. Thanks for your comment on my site – yours is awesome too! I also like the Book Depository. I use AbeBooks mainly, and through them the vendors such as this list some of their stuff. I’m pretty sure that company does as well.

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  3. I am crying with laughter. It’s the writers version of planking, “Fishing in Lake Odball,” It may go viral yet. LOL. Thank you for enlightening me to the wonderful world of colouring books, off to sharpen my pencils and purchase my Amish colouring book, cheers Julie

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  4. Fantastic, I have not seen such a random collection of books for a while, love the Amish colouring book. it should be mandatory for good book shops to sell this stuff. It would make buying books drunk so much more eventful.

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  5. BookDepositry bookmarked, credit card topped up, crack open that box of vintage crayolas I’d been saving for just this occasion and we’re off to colouring nirvana! What a riot…

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  6. Pingback: Bruce’s Lucky Dip: Kickin’ Knitting…. | thebookshelfgargoyle

  7. Pingback: Bruce’s Lucky Dip: Paper Dolls You Never Played With as a Kid… | thebookshelfgargoyle

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