Bad Poetry Contest: Am I too late to enter?????

10

Bad Poetry Day

Good evening lovelies!  I have just this second found out about a bad poetry contest being hosted over at Oz the Terrier’s blog and at Haiku by Ku, having been alerted by a post from the lovely (and fluffy!) Misaki! Unfortunately I have only just found out about this, and I think the contest closes tonight, so time prevents me from doing a really terrible effort….but on the other hand, perhaps the short timeframe will provide the perfect gestational conditions for the creation of something truly awful.  I have decided, in keeping with my love of written pieces for those with tiny attention spans, to create for this contest a mini-Ode. Or Odette, if you like.

I have titled my entry:

Ode to a Yodel

Yodel-ay-hee-hooooooooo – ray!

I’ve added in the linky at the end of this post so you can hop around and appreciate (and vote for!) the brilliance and the badness in the other entries…enjoy!

And just for weirdness’ sake, as this is primarily a book blog, here’s the weirdest yodelling-related book I could find on such short notice. I think you’ll agree it’s a cracker:

the-yodel-of-cthulhu

Adios amigos!

Mad Martha

Powered by Linky Tools

Click here to enter your link and view this Linky Tools list…

Ode to a Library: Mad Martha breaks with tradition…again

4

Hello again my fellow blog-opolists! I have decided to make up for my protracted abscence by providing two pieces of poetic proliferation in quick succession.  Today I feel the need to wax lyrical on the glorious and fantastic phenomenon known as “the library”.  I am still amazed that there exists a place – indeed, multiple places! – from which one can literally walk out the door carrying 20 books, with the implicit trust on behalf of the lender that said books will return safe and sound.  Amazing! So please enjoy this Ode which was inspired partly by Bruce’s rambling and random recollections about a book of poems by CJ Dennis that may or may not feature in an upcoming edition of his Retro Reading series….

library card

Who’s the main appointee to lend books out for free?

Come on! Let’s hear it for libraries!

Who welcomes us all into crisp, tome-lined halls?

Give a cheer! Let’s hear it for libraries!

Whose fine, expert staff know their wheat from their chaff

and direct us toward reading glory?

So Stand UP! Lend your EAR!

Let your Voices ring CLEAR

As WE SHOUT OUT IN PRAISE OF

*click click click*

Ahem! Excuse me!

Oh. Yes?

This is a library. You’ll have to keep it down.

Oh, right. Sorry.

*click click click*

(Sotto voce):

So stand up! Lend your ear! Let your voices ring clear

as we shout out in praise of our libraries…

quietly.

And just in case those of you in the back thought you got away with it, Library Cat has something to tell you:

library cat

Consider yourself warned!

Mad Martha

Ode to a…Publisher?: Mad Martha breaks ranks…

0

Afternoon my sweeties! Today I have decided to do something a little bit different with my ode.  You may be able to guess what it is if you cast your eyeballs even briefly over the title of this post.  Yes, that’s right – instead of a single author, I am going to laud a whole publishing house! Bruce has already mentioned our love for Angry Robot Books in a previous post but I must reiterate that AR is fast becoming our go-to publisher when we are looking for something just a bit different.

Angry Robot

To give you an idea of what I mean when I say different, it’s something just a little bit quirky.  A tad odd.  Both funny ha-ha and funny peculiar.  They have superheroes with demon sidekicks.  Seven foot tall skeleton kings.  Houses with whole worlds hidden inside. And of course the usual, run-of-the-mill complement of robots, zombies, armies of people in various states of death and undeath, people with animal familiars and various telepathic abilities, and so on and so forth.  Our absolute favourite of their authors (and one of the first we discovered!) is Mike Shevdon, creator of the Courts of the Feyre series…..do go and buy it, won’t you?  We also like Lee Battersby, he of the Corpse-Rat King, and we have dallied with Chris F Holm, Matthew Hughes and Guy Adams to name a few…their works are pictured below:

sixty one nailscorpse rat

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

dead harvestdamned busters

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

world house

 

And so, to the ode.  See if you can spot the intended pun in the fifth line!

 

For Zombies and Monsters and Weirdies, oh my!,

on Angry Robot I always rely. 

For the kooky, the freakish or old-fashioned gore,

this publishing house really comes to the fore!

Want bold savage tomes and a wild, novel quest?

Then grab ye a bookmark and raid AR’s chest!

I’m not sure why I went all pirate in the last line, but such is the effect of Angry Robot.  It makes one step outside the box…usually into another larger box filled with flesh eating caterpillars or some other such freakishness.  So if the sound of an aggressive larval Lepidoptera squishing under your boot is music to your ears (…..shame on you…you should take a good long hard look at yourself Mr…or Ms….) then this is the publisher for you!

Until next time,

Mad Martha